Erika and her boy friend and one or two other couples were out at night. She graduated high school in June, 2009 and had been accepted to a local community college. She planned to start in September, 2009. On this Friday night, at the start of Labor Day weekend, the group of young people were out walking, perhaps they were going to a party or coming from a party. The suburban neighborhood where they lived was, of course, very dark. The driver never saw them as he came down the street they were crossing. Erika was a tiny girl, petite and thin. The entire group of teens was struck by the car. Erika was hit first and died instantly. Two of the other children were badly injured, but lived. The others were slightly injured, I believe Erika's boy friend escaped injury. The man who was driving the car was not drunk or on drugs, he simply didn't see them in the dark. He was never charged with a crime.

I could not believe what my nephew's wife was telling me. A chill came over me as I looked at my own daughter's pictures. She was 22 at the time and had not lived with me for several years after her dad and I got divorced. But we are close. She and Erika shared that special day, their birthday, on August 6th. One 22, alive, and one 18, deceased.

We are Jewish, so we bury our deceased immediately. Erika died on a Friday and Saturday is our Sabbath. She was buried on Sunday. The family lives far from me so no one called me until Monday. They knew I would not be able to drive a long distance to the funeral and it all happened so fast. I have some health problems, so they thought it best to wait and then tell me after the funeral.

My niece by marriage talked to me for a long time on the phone. In my religion, we mourn after the funeral, it's called "sitting shiva". We visit the deceased person's relatives, express our condolences, and often bring food. My niece told me Erika's parents were sitting shiva until Wednesday night.

When we hung up I cried for a long time. Then I called my daughter and told her what had happened. We arranged to make a condolence call together. I drove to her dad's house. She drove the rest of the way. She bought a platter of vegetables or fruit, I cannot recall which because I'm crying as I write this. It's almost Labor Day Weekend and I know Erika's parents will be in agony. My sister has been crying since Erika died. Her mother is my sister's niece and she's very close to her.

We arrived after 6 P.M. and entered the townhouse. It was filled with people, family and friends, many of them very young -- Erika's friends and classmates from high school. My daughter and I hugged her mother and father and expressed our sympathy. The sad thing about funerals and condolence calls is that you see people you hardly ever see. Erika's mother's oldest brother and his wife were there, as well as their son. Her other brother was unable to be there that night, but his wife and one of their sons were there. My sister and her husband were there. Erika's grandmother, her mother's mom, had flown north from Florida. There were many more people there. We talked, cried, ate and drank and then the rabbi came and we went outside and had a service. No one could hold back tears. It was terribly sad.